Negative Nellies vs. Positive Pollies

Ok, so I'm a huge fan of dreams.  Not just the dreams that occur while your snoring loudly, and drooling on your pillow.  But the dreams you have for your life.  To me, if you don't have a dream that you're working towards, then life is kind of boring.  So I like to have lots and lots of dreams.  Blame the ADD, but it seems to work for me.  Now, some of my dreams are silly, for instance the one where I'm running for president and my campaign slogan is "Oh dear! Four more years?" is most likely never going to happen.  But the dreams I have of becoming a published author, a wife, a mother, a business owner, now THOSE dreams, they could happen. 


So lately I've been trying to take steps to make those dreams come true.  I've been writing like there's no tomorrow, and I've recently decided to try my hand at catering.  I love, love, love to cook for others, might as well make some money at it right?  And the wife and mother part, well we'll just have to wait and see. I figure God's in control on that one, so we'll just leave it up to Him!  But while I've been doing these things I've noticed something....anythime you try to step out in faith and accomplish your goals, there are going to be people that try to stand in your way.


This is a phenomena that is sad, but so true.  And what makes it even worse is that the people that will try to dreamblock you are usually people you care about.  This is something that is hard for me to understand.  I don't get why people would want to be a negative force in someone's life.  I like to think of myself as a Positive Polly, so this type of behavior just baffles me.  So I had to do some thinking, and I've come up with a survival guide when dealing with Negative Nellies.


First~ You need to realize that their unhappiness is not your problem.  I know that sounds kind of cruel, but it's very true.  This lesson has taken me a LONG time to learn.  Someone I love is a very unhappy person.  And I honestly felt guilty if I was happy, and they weren't.  It's like I thought I had to be unhappy too, in order to keep things fair.  That's just silliness!  You can't force people to be happy.  You can encourage them, support them, love on them, and be there for them, but ulitmately they have to choose to be happy. 


Second~ You can't let them get inside your head.  This is a tough one.  Negative Nellies are known for spreading their negative energy.  They will do whatever they can to get you to feel the way they do.  And a lot of times they don't know they're doing it!  That's just how they roll.  You know the type I'm talking about.  The person that when you tell them you've won a free trip to England, they're like "Well, I hope the plane doesn't crash" instead of just saying congratulations.  In most cases, the negativity is way more severe than that, but you get the idea.  It's like they have to tell you everything that can go wrong, so you start doubting what it is you want to do.  DON'T!!  Then you'll find yourself stuck, and you'll run the risk of becoming one of THEM.  You have to shut out all the voices that tell you you can't, and listen to the voice that says you can. 


Third~ You can't let them see you squirm.  Negative Nellies look for a reaction.  They want to see that the doubts they've placed inside your head have hit home.  You can't allow that to happen.  Recently I've been battling a Negative Nelly.  And man, they were winning!  But I got some advice from a very strong person in my life, and he told me to just stand my ground and when the Negative Nelly starts in on me, to just ignore it.  He told me not to walk away from the argument, because then it looks like I'm weak, but to sit there and pretend I'm deaf.  And you know what??  It works!!  My Negative Nelly loses all steam when I just act like I can't hear a word they're saying.  Before, when I reacted, it was like handing over a victory.  Now, my Negative Nelly rants less, because they aren't getting the anything from the discussion. 


Fourth~ Stay positive!  Don't let their negativity spill over into your life!  I admit, I used to have a problem with this.  I would let all the negative energy get to me, and I woud run and hide(really mature, I know). But now, not matter what they throw at me, I stay happy.  Don't get me wrong, I have my moments, but then I pray about it, reset my mind, and move on.  I've never been happier in my life, than I am right now.  And I very easily could succumb to negativity, I've got my issues, but I choose to focus on all the good things in my life.  So don't let anyone get you down! 


So there you go.  Hope this helps all my Positive Pollies out there!  You all just keep on keeping on!!